Video Title / Caption	“knowing him as i did, i am certain he cared little about himself but wanted to ask them to spare the lives of his wife and children.” — grand duke aleksandr mikhailovich 108 years ago today, a golden-hearted man, alongside his beloved wife, beautiful children, and loyal friends, had their lives taken in one of history’s greatest injustices. martyrs they became. i decided to make this post centred on nikolai because, on this day especially, people rarely speak about him for who he truly was. instead, his name is so often dragged into conversations for all the wrong reasons, particularly within the otma fandom. today, i simply want to remember him. nicky, dear, you were only fifty years old when your world came crashing down. a report from count benckendorff, who saw you less than a year before your martyrdom, has never failed to break my heart: “he said that he had nothing to live for now, that he did not care so far.” and then, when that dreadful night finally arrived, your final recorded words were, “you know not what you do.” no words could ever express how much better you deserved. but perhaps this, too, was within God’s will. as you once said yourself: “God’s wishes shall be fulfilled. i was born on may sixth, the day of job the sufferer. i am ready to accept my doom.” sometimes i wonder if this was, in a way, your happy ending. you gave your life for the motherland you tried so earnestly to serve, and today you stand among the saints alongside your family. every year, countless pilgrims gather at the place of your martyrdom to honour your memory. yet there will always be a part of me that wishes things had been different. i wish you had been allowed to grow old. i wish you had walked your daughters down the aisle. you were such a devoted father that i can only imagine what kind of grandfather you would have become. those ordinary moments of life were stolen from you before you ever had the chance to experience them. but now, dear nicky, you dwell in the Kingdom of Heaven, where no hatred, betrayal, or cruelty can ever reach you again. thank you for the impact you’ve had on my life. learning about you has changed me in ways i never expected, and for that i will always remain grateful. you were never a perfect man, just as no ruler ever has been. yet history has reserved a particular cruelty for you, burying your name beneath decades of lies and slander. those who truly knew you painted a remarkably different portrait from the caricature your enemies left behind. and even those who betrayed or stood against you could not deny the goodness of your heart. perhaps no words capture that better than those of your own cousin: “God cannot have meant you all to suffer like this. Or did He find that Nicky had suffered enough and that for a kind and pure heart like his, eternal rest might be granted sooner. Perhaps He knew that poor heart had borne its trials to breaking point and He took him out of this world of suffering and wrongdoing, that he, who had never meant harm to anybody, should no more be at the mercy of the wicked.” — princess victoria melita, grand duchess kirill perhaps that is what i admire most about you. even while you still walked this earth, you carried the heart of a saint. you taught your children to forgive the very people who had wronged your family. you answered hatred with gentleness, betrayal with faith, and suffering with quiet endurance. may your memory be eternal, dear nicky. 🪽 — #historytok #otma #tsarnicholasii
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Knowing Him As I Did I Am Certain “Knowing He Cared Little About

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